Managers discover an employee's social media account, then proceed to ‘gang up’ on her by hazing her on the job: ‘They were writing a physical list of my failures’

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  • Three colleagues look at a digital tablet together, smiling.
  • "My managers are ‘ganging up’ on me after finding my social media. Is this a power play or am I overthinking?"

    I (F) work in a hospitality hotel setting while I'm currently being vetted for a high- level government role (Ministry of Justice).
  • I have a Master's degree and generally keep a professional distance at work. However, things took a weird turn this weekend and today was absolute h..I.
  • One of the staff members, let's call her "Lynn," has always been a bit intense, shouting at me to "smile for the camera" when I use Face ID or giving me "elevator eyes" (scanning me head-to-toe).
  • She frequently posts "skinny" throwbacks of herself from 6 years ago, and I've been told by others I have a very "sporty" and fit look, and one colleague mistook me for gym staff.
  • Against my better judgment, I accepted her Facebook friend request on Friday. She's seen my "real life" no photos of me at cathedrals, in nice dresses, etc.
  • She hasn't "viewed" a single one of my stories, but today she came into work on a mission.
  • Lynn and another manager, Clare, spent the whole day following me around. • They walked into the room I was cleaning together (overkill for a toilet brush replacement I'd already found) just to "patronize" me by calling me "lovely Alice." Before Lynn even stepped into my room for an audit, she snapped, "Anna, make sure you dust under that table." ⚫ They "found" microscopic faults, dust under a shelf and a mark on bathroom ledge and told me they were writing a physical list of my failures.
  • A custodial employee cleans the windows of an establishment.
  • When I professionally asked them to just WhatsApp or email the feedback, Claire literally said, "No, I'll write it on this paper because I can't spell properly." ⚫ To top it off, as Lynnleft the room, she shouted down the hallway in front of everyone, "Anna, hoover outside room 513, there are bits of crisps on the floor." I feel like because they know I'm overqualified and moving on to a better career, they are desperate to "humble" me by obsessing over dust and crisps.
  • It feels like a coordinated effort to make me look "muddled" or incompetent before I leave.
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  • vibransea It sounds like jealousy. Her friending you was an effort to push her way into your private life to see what you have going on. Now she's inflamed and taking her insecurity out on you. I would move on as soon as you can.
  • maya_love5 Stay calm and professional. Acknowledge the list politely, fix what needs fixing, and don't engage in drama. Their behavior reflects their insecurity, not you. Focus on your next chapter.
  • Veronica01-22-2005 Defriend her immediately She doesn't deserve that kind of access to your life She showed herself in spades Block block and block.
  • RespectableBloke6 They're just jealous
  • Mr_Gaslight Move on and move up. Let them be queens of their tiny hills.
  • Jolly-Woodpecker-359 You are dealing with a narcissist. Document document document starting NOW.
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